How Many People Should Give a Toast at Our Wedding?

I suggest limiting the toasts to three or four -- father of the bride (especially if he’s hosting), the best man, maid of honor and the bride and groom together. And all toasts should be kept to a few minutes in length.

A wedding reception tends to include a list of traditional elements: first dance, parent dances, blessing over the food, cultural dance (such as the hora), bouquet and garter tosses, cake cutting ceremony, plus toasts. Cutting the toast list down is one way to ensure that your guests have time on the dance floor as well as time to speak with each other and the bride and groom. I would also suggest cutting the bouquet and garter tosses if you want more dancing time.

If you have other relatives and friends who want to say something, and especially if their speech is more of a roast than a toast, I would ask them to speak at the rehearsal dinner.

Rehearsal Dinner Toast

I was at dinner this evening at a local restaurant and there was a large party of about 30 people at the next table.  At first we thought it was a birthday or anniversary dinner but it turns out that it was a rehearsal dinner.  The couple is getting married tomorrow.

How do I know?  The bride and groom made a toast and thanked everyone for coming, said they looked forward to having them with them tomorrow and then handed out blue handkerchiefs.

You usually hear wedding experts talk about the bridal party and parents roasting and toasting the bride and groom at the rehearsal dinner but it's a nice idea for the bride and groom to say something too.

The couple tonight spoke for maybe 2-3 minutes.  Their speech was simple - they thanked everyone for being at the dinner and said they were looking forward to tomorrow.

So before you call it a night at your rehearsal dinner, say a few words to your guests - after all they are your closest friends and relatives.

Toasting Tips From Weddings I've Been To

So at the wedding we went to - the one with the guy who looked more like a paparazzi than a wedding guest - there were four toasts.  I have to say that I was a littler worried that they would take forever because all four people - the groom's brother and best friend and two friends of the bride - all got up at the same time and spoke one after the other but each kept it short and sweet - no longer than 5 minutes each - and they were all great toasts.

They told funny anecdotes about the couple.  The older brother joked about how he would abuse his younger brother when they were kids, the groom's friend told a few quick and funny things about stupid things the groom had done over the years.  And for the bride, both women shared stories of how they met her in college and what she had told them about the groom when she first met him.  One of which his friends will never let him forget.

It's important to keep wedding toasts/speeches short but also light and friendly.  Add a joke or two, tell the couple you wish all the best and then raise a glass for all the guests to toast the couple with you.

Don't bring up past relationships - one father of the bride mentioned the bride's ex during his toast at a wedding we went to a few years back, never a good sign - and don't ramble.  Prepare your remarks or make some notes so you have a guide as to what you want to say.

And if you've had a few drinks to get rid of nerves, remember that a drunk toast maker is probably not going to make a great toast, so keep the cocktails to a minimum until after you've toasted the couple.

Cheers!

You're probably expecting your best man and maid-of-honor to make a speech at the wedding. And why shouldn't you? Toasting the bride and groom is part of their job description. But some people, no matter how close they are to you, don't know what to say.

There are several companies that will help write the perfect speech, and give the toaster tips on how to speak in front of a crowd. Here's a list of some companies you can refer your best man and maid-of-honor to:

Instant Wedding Toasts
The Perfect Toast
Ultimate Speeches

Wedding Tip - It's common for the newlyweds to give a short speech at their wedding. Sometimes the groom will thank everyone and toast his new bride, or the couple can both toast their parents and thank them for their love and support.