Was I upset that it rained on our wedding day? Yes, because we only got a few photos outdoors and couldn't have cocktail hour outside. But one of the best shots our photographers got were the two of us walking back into the schul as it stared drizzling while Dave held a lavender umbrella over us - and his brother, the best man, held my train.
After seeing the forecast my mom and I ran to a dollar store and found colored umbrellas and the lavender ones matched the weddings color palette so it worked out great in photos. But it would have been a great photo even if the umbrella was black or had a pattern.
If rain is in your wedding day forecast grab a few umbrellas and hope for the best. There's nothing you can do about the weather so don't stress about it. And if your wedding will be entirely outdoors, make sure you reserve a tent and the necessary accoutrements just in case you need them.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Prenups
I know this topic isn't the most fun or romantic wedding-related one but it's important to address the issue.
While most of us are not gazillionaires protecting a vast fortune there are some of us who are. There are also family items - money, property, things - that if a divorce should happen you will want to remain in your family.
Just because you and your fiance discuss and get a prenup doesn't mean that you don't believe in your marriage. But if g-d forbid you do get divorced, and remember that about 50% of marriages do, you'll kick yourself for not having one.
I know that a prenuptial agreement isn't included in the traditional wedding budget breakdowns but price one out with a lawyer - I'm sure you, your fiance or one of your parents will know one - and file the canceled check under miscellaneous expenses.
Do we have one? No we don't but that's because I don't want his baseball card collection and he doesn't want any of my handbags.
While most of us are not gazillionaires protecting a vast fortune there are some of us who are. There are also family items - money, property, things - that if a divorce should happen you will want to remain in your family.
Just because you and your fiance discuss and get a prenup doesn't mean that you don't believe in your marriage. But if g-d forbid you do get divorced, and remember that about 50% of marriages do, you'll kick yourself for not having one.
I know that a prenuptial agreement isn't included in the traditional wedding budget breakdowns but price one out with a lawyer - I'm sure you, your fiance or one of your parents will know one - and file the canceled check under miscellaneous expenses.
Do we have one? No we don't but that's because I don't want his baseball card collection and he doesn't want any of my handbags.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
If You're Giving Out Shower Favors At Least Make It a Good One
While favors aren't mandatory at any wedding-related party, a lot of hostesses like to give them out because it's traditional.
Bridal shower favors can be cheesy but they don't have to be! You can find something that goes with the shower's theme or something that the bride likes that you think the guests will enjoy too. It's important not spend too much money on favors and don't buy anything that if you got at a bridal shower you would throw out as soon as you got home.
Here are some favor ideas you may want to consider:
Bridal shower favors can be cheesy but they don't have to be! You can find something that goes with the shower's theme or something that the bride likes that you think the guests will enjoy too. It's important not spend too much money on favors and don't buy anything that if you got at a bridal shower you would throw out as soon as you got home.
Here are some favor ideas you may want to consider:
- Edible favors such as chocolate, cookies, candy, tea. Food is always a hit!
- Musical favors. You can burn a CD of songs that you think guests will enjoy. It can be a mix of the bride's favorites, somehow related to the party's theme or have a general theme like love songs or dance music.
- Lottery tickets are very cheap - $1-5 per scratch off - and everyone loves playing.
- Seeds or a small plant. This is great for eco-fans but there's no guarantee that all of your guests have a green thumb.
- Monograms. Items that can be monogrammed with the guest's initial not the bride's are a good idea but depending on what it is this can be pricey. I've hosted showers where each guest was given a monogrammed handkerchief (less than $5 each) and I've been a shower guest where I received a mug with a large A on it. It happens to be one of my most favorite favors ever.
As for pricing shower favors I would try and stick to $5 - $10 max per favor. Remember that you are giving one favor to every person there, plus the other hostesses and the bride so let's say you spend $8 on each favor times 30 people, you're spending $240 on favors -- and this doesn't including shipping, tax and any special packaging like a cello bag, ribbon and favor tag.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
The Groom and the Bridal Shower
If you're having an all girls shower than I suggest asking some men to show up at the end of the shower to help bring the gifts to the cars.
You should have the fathers of the bride and groom, any brothers and the groom arrive about 30-45 minutes toward the end of the party to say hello and load the car(s) with the bags and boxes of gifts you (and the groom) received.
Another idea is to get the groom to arrive earlier and take part in a game - like the newlywed game - during the shower. I like this idea because it's more fun when you hear the groom's responses live and you can see the couple interact with each other.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Bridal Shower Game
If you follow my @aisledash Twittter feed then you read that I was at a bridal shower over the weekend. It was at tea party at Lady Mendel's in Manhattan.
One of the games the bridesmaids planned was bridal themed Scattergories. It was a lot of fun - I love Scattergories, and I won! Here's how it works:
Come up with a list or 8-10 categories and then use the first letter of the bride's name and the groom's name for the two rounds. We only had time to score one round so another idea is to play one round and use the first letter of the bride's name or the first letter of what the bride's married name will be.
In this case the letter for round one was S and for round two D. Some of the categories were: Something you find at a bridal shower, something the bride will need on her wedding day, a word to describe the bride, a word to describe the groom, the bride's favorite food, something you find on a bridal registry and a pet name for a spouse.
Scoring it is difficult because the idea is that you want to have the most original answers. If someone else has what you wrote then you don't get a point. The bridesmaid running the game first had people shouting their answers and she didn't always catch what people said so by the 5th category she went table by table allowing a few people to give their answer. This allowed people to hear if they got a point or not, but it also dragged the game on and that's why we only got through one round.
So if you play this game, which is a lot of fun, maybe you want to limit it to one round and if you have a lot of guests maybe you want the tables to play against each other.
One of the games the bridesmaids planned was bridal themed Scattergories. It was a lot of fun - I love Scattergories, and I won! Here's how it works:
Come up with a list or 8-10 categories and then use the first letter of the bride's name and the groom's name for the two rounds. We only had time to score one round so another idea is to play one round and use the first letter of the bride's name or the first letter of what the bride's married name will be.
In this case the letter for round one was S and for round two D. Some of the categories were: Something you find at a bridal shower, something the bride will need on her wedding day, a word to describe the bride, a word to describe the groom, the bride's favorite food, something you find on a bridal registry and a pet name for a spouse.
Scoring it is difficult because the idea is that you want to have the most original answers. If someone else has what you wrote then you don't get a point. The bridesmaid running the game first had people shouting their answers and she didn't always catch what people said so by the 5th category she went table by table allowing a few people to give their answer. This allowed people to hear if they got a point or not, but it also dragged the game on and that's why we only got through one round.
So if you play this game, which is a lot of fun, maybe you want to limit it to one round and if you have a lot of guests maybe you want the tables to play against each other.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Keep an Open Mind
When you hire a vendor, sign a contract and leave a deposit you are tied to a vendor but that doesn't mean the ideas you discussed are the final ideas for your wedding. You have the option to change your mind on your theme and colors and wedding details up until about a month or so before.
Your wedding cake will not be made until the week of your wedding. The flowers won't be ordered until 2 to 4 weeks before. So it's okay to keep looking at wedding blogs and magazines to find new and interesting ideas.
When you schedule appointments with your wedding vendors bring all of your ideas with you - especially photos - and let your vendor help you pinpoint what your wedding will look and feel like. You don't have to use every idea - some may be good for other wedding-related parties or future occasions. But keep looking for inspiration until about a month before your wedding. Remember that when you send your wedding invitations out they will show guests your theme and colors and give them an idea of the look and feel over your wedding, so at that point it's just a few details you can tweak you can't really go back to the drawing board with a whole new concept.
Your wedding cake will not be made until the week of your wedding. The flowers won't be ordered until 2 to 4 weeks before. So it's okay to keep looking at wedding blogs and magazines to find new and interesting ideas.
When you schedule appointments with your wedding vendors bring all of your ideas with you - especially photos - and let your vendor help you pinpoint what your wedding will look and feel like. You don't have to use every idea - some may be good for other wedding-related parties or future occasions. But keep looking for inspiration until about a month before your wedding. Remember that when you send your wedding invitations out they will show guests your theme and colors and give them an idea of the look and feel over your wedding, so at that point it's just a few details you can tweak you can't really go back to the drawing board with a whole new concept.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
It's Important to Get a Good Night's Rest the Night Before Your Wedding
The night before your wedding is not the time to throw a bachelor or bacheloette party. If you're having a rehearsal dinner I suggest that you start the evening early - maybe 6 or 7pm - so that it won't end too late and you can get as much sleep as you can the night before your wedding.
If you or your groom are planning on having your bridal party spend the night with you give them a heads up that there are to be no wild parties planned, no surprises.
Of course you're going to be exciting and you may have trouble going to sleep but don't start testing out sleep aids. Have a calm night -- watch a movie (nothing to suspenseful), have some decaf tea or a glass of wine and relax and try to go to bed early.
You don't want to wake up the morning of your wedding with a hangover or exhausted, and you definitely don't want to oversleep.
Just be safe, I'd set an alarm clock and if you're staying at a hotel, schedule a wake-up call.
If you or your groom are planning on having your bridal party spend the night with you give them a heads up that there are to be no wild parties planned, no surprises.
Of course you're going to be exciting and you may have trouble going to sleep but don't start testing out sleep aids. Have a calm night -- watch a movie (nothing to suspenseful), have some decaf tea or a glass of wine and relax and try to go to bed early.
You don't want to wake up the morning of your wedding with a hangover or exhausted, and you definitely don't want to oversleep.
Just be safe, I'd set an alarm clock and if you're staying at a hotel, schedule a wake-up call.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Niemierko The Blog
Mark Niemierko, London's top wedding planner and my buddy at bridal market, just launched a fabulous blog that I thought you should know about.
It's written for the British bride but Mark's great sense of style is good for wedding inspiration and basic planning information for brides around the world.
The Blog, the official name is Niemierko The Blog, has a few great franchises including, Love It/Hate It, Mr N with answers to common wedding planning and style dilemmas and Mark Meets with interviews on some of the top wedding vendors and editors.
I love Mark's common sense advice and I think you will too. And if you're thinking of getting hitched in the UK, definitely schedule an appointment with Mark. His website is niemierko.com
It's written for the British bride but Mark's great sense of style is good for wedding inspiration and basic planning information for brides around the world.
The Blog, the official name is Niemierko The Blog, has a few great franchises including, Love It/Hate It, Mr N with answers to common wedding planning and style dilemmas and Mark Meets with interviews on some of the top wedding vendors and editors.
I love Mark's common sense advice and I think you will too. And if you're thinking of getting hitched in the UK, definitely schedule an appointment with Mark. His website is niemierko.com
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Being a Wedding Planner Is NOT Like Being the Bride
I'm sorry, but that's the truth. I get emails and meet people all the time who say they want to be wedding planners. Most of the people who have this "epiphany" are brides-to-be or recent brides who are having/had SO much fun planning their wedding that they want to change careers.
What I tell them is that being a wedding planner is not like being a bride. And then I tell them not to quit their day job.
As the bride you make all the decisions and you get all the attention. As the wedding planner you are answering to a client's wishes and dealing with her emotional roller coaster that is her engagement and wedding and in some instances, her mother's issues too.
When you're the wedding planner you don't get to plan the wedding you want or would have planned if you could do it again. You have to plan the wedding your client, the bride wants, even if you don't love her color scheme and ideas.
As the wedding planner you are trying to make a living. You have to charge people money and $1000 or $2000 a wedding isn't going to pay the bills. Trust me, no wedding planner, no matter how successful is booked EVERY weekend of the year.
As the wedding planner you're on call all the time and working weekends. Are you prepared to give up your weekends?
If you truly think that being a wedding planner is your calling in life than here's my advice:
1. Do NOT quit your day job.
2. See if there's a wedding or event planner in your area who is looking for interns or assistants who you can work with on weekends or evenings.
3. Be prepared to work for little money in the beginning because you have no experience and you have to pay your dues. Planning your own wedding doesn't count as wedding planning experience.
4. Look into taking event planning classes. Some colleges offer non-credit event marketing/planning courses or a continuing education program might have a focus on event planning. Or sometimes organizations like the Learning Annex or the Association of Bridal Consultants will hold seminars on the topic.
5. Do your research. Find out how many wedding planners are in your area and talk to other wedding vendors about what services may be lacking. Maybe you don't want to be a full-service planner. Maybe you want to focus on day-of, which is never only a day. More on that to come.
What I tell them is that being a wedding planner is not like being a bride. And then I tell them not to quit their day job.
As the bride you make all the decisions and you get all the attention. As the wedding planner you are answering to a client's wishes and dealing with her emotional roller coaster that is her engagement and wedding and in some instances, her mother's issues too.
When you're the wedding planner you don't get to plan the wedding you want or would have planned if you could do it again. You have to plan the wedding your client, the bride wants, even if you don't love her color scheme and ideas.
As the wedding planner you are trying to make a living. You have to charge people money and $1000 or $2000 a wedding isn't going to pay the bills. Trust me, no wedding planner, no matter how successful is booked EVERY weekend of the year.
As the wedding planner you're on call all the time and working weekends. Are you prepared to give up your weekends?
If you truly think that being a wedding planner is your calling in life than here's my advice:
1. Do NOT quit your day job.
2. See if there's a wedding or event planner in your area who is looking for interns or assistants who you can work with on weekends or evenings.
3. Be prepared to work for little money in the beginning because you have no experience and you have to pay your dues. Planning your own wedding doesn't count as wedding planning experience.
4. Look into taking event planning classes. Some colleges offer non-credit event marketing/planning courses or a continuing education program might have a focus on event planning. Or sometimes organizations like the Learning Annex or the Association of Bridal Consultants will hold seminars on the topic.
5. Do your research. Find out how many wedding planners are in your area and talk to other wedding vendors about what services may be lacking. Maybe you don't want to be a full-service planner. Maybe you want to focus on day-of, which is never only a day. More on that to come.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Really Quick Tip Because I Want to Go Watch Mad Men
We DVR'd it - I know it's Monday!
Dave has the worst luck when planning trips. Not my Dave, a friend of his.
His bachelor party, the bachelor party he planned as a best man a few years back, and most recently his honeymoon were all ruined because of bad weather planning.
Each trip was planned during the destination's rainy or hurricane season and he either had to cut a trip short and catch an emergency flight, change his plans from a rented villa to a hotel airport or cancel the trip altogether.
So when booking your honeymoon - or any trip for that matter - make sure you look into what the expected weather is and book travel insurance if you're going to risk it.
Dave has the worst luck when planning trips. Not my Dave, a friend of his.
His bachelor party, the bachelor party he planned as a best man a few years back, and most recently his honeymoon were all ruined because of bad weather planning.
Each trip was planned during the destination's rainy or hurricane season and he either had to cut a trip short and catch an emergency flight, change his plans from a rented villa to a hotel airport or cancel the trip altogether.
So when booking your honeymoon - or any trip for that matter - make sure you look into what the expected weather is and book travel insurance if you're going to risk it.
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