We Want to Be as Eco-Friendly As Possible, Are Emailed Wedding Invitations Okay?

Since a wedding is a traditional event, no matter how untraditional your wedding may be, I would suggest you send your wedding invitations via the post office, but choose an invitation that is eco-friendly.

There are many stationery companies that create invites that are 100% green. A quick Goggle search will bring up hundreds of results. Some companies will offer invites printed on paper sourced from cotton (Crane & Co), while others will use recycled paper. They use inks made from vegetable dyes as well as embellishments, like ribbons and bands, made from recycled materials.

An e-vite may seem like both an eco and budget-friendly option, and while I think that evites are fine for save-the-date cards and the rehearsal dinner invitation, a wedding invitation should arrive in a real mailbox not a virtual one.

My Parents are Paying for the Wedding and My Fiance’s Parents Want Their Names on the Wedding Invitation Too, What are Our Options?

The wording of a wedding invitation is broken into several parts:

Host Line (who is hosting a/k/a paying)
Request Line (the invitation to come to the wedding)
Bride and Groom Line (the name of the couple)
Date and Time Line
Location Line (where the ceremony will be held)
Reception Line (where and when the reception will be held or a separate card)
R.S.V.P Line (on the lower left corner or a separate card/envelope)
Attire Line (lower right corner, optional)

Since the groom’s parents are not hosting or co-hosting the wedding you can put their names under the groom’s. Example:

Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Jones

invite you to the wedding of their daughter

Samantha Louise

to

John Smith

son of

Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Smith

Saturday, June 18, 2011

at six o’clock in the evening

Tribeca Rooftop

reception immediately following

If your parents don’t really care you can add the groom’s parents names to the host line if it’s a bigger deal to them. Remember, it’s important to not have World War III break out as it gets closer to your wedding day so try and accommodate your future in-laws if you can.

The invite with the co-host line would read something like:

Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Jones

and

Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Smith

invite you to the marriage of their children

Samantha Louise

and

John Smith

Saturday, June 18, 2011

at six o’clock in the evening

Tribeca Rooftop

reception immediately following

How to Write Thank-You Notes

For every gift you receive during your engagement, you need to send a thank-you note. You can purchase note cards at your local stationery store or order personalized cards that reflect both of your personalities. You can choose something fun or formal.

If you already know what your wedding theme and palette will be, order thank-you notes that reflect the wedding. You can use them throughout your engagement and even into your married life.

Here are a few tips on writing a great thank-you note:

1 - Express your gratitude for the gift: "Thank you so much for the cappuccino maker," or "Thank you for your generous gift."

2 - Mention how you are, or are planning on, using the item: "John loves it, and has begun making us cappuccinos after dinner every night," or "We plan on putting it toward our new home."

3 - Mention the future: "We're looking forward to celebrating with you at our wedding."

4 - You must send a note per each gift you receive, so if Aunt Jane sends engagement, shower and wedding gifts, send her three notes -- one for each gift.

5 - Send thank-you notes in a timely manner: within two weeks of receiving an engagement or shower gift, and for your wedding gifts, within eight weeks of returning from your honeymoon.

Proofs are Important

I got the proof for the baby announcement today with an email that any changes and additional proofs made may cost me money.  There are a few changes I want to make and I was on the fence if I should order a proof or just send in the changes and send them to the printer.  And then I thought about it.

What if there's another error in the second draft that they don't see and the 200 cards are printed with an error?  I'd pay another few hundred dollars for the new print run, when a second proof may cost me at the most $100.  So I'm going to pay for the new proof to be safe.

When it comes to your wedding save-the-date cards, invitations, programs and other printed items I highly recommend getting a proof and checking it twice.  You may also want to have a parent, sibling and/or friend review copy before you even send it in for a proof to make sure that all spelling and grammatical errors are caught.

Wedding Invitation & Stationery Trunk Shows

You often hear of wedding dress trunk shows, but there are also trunk shows for wedding invitations and stationery.

Similar to a wedding dress trunk show, at a stationery store you can expect to find a stationery designer  or representative from the company.

He or she will have the entire line available to look through and talk to you about all your options - especially customization options.

And similar to a wedding dress trunk show the stationery company/store will also offer you discounts and/or promotions.

Some stationery stores may require an appointment so you may want to call the store ahead of time to see if scheduling an appointment is necessary.

Next week Spark Letterpress Love will be having a trunk show at Kate's Paperie in New York City. There are three promotions being offered when you purchase a Spark Letterpress Love wedding invitations, thank you notes and social stationery.

Don't Forget to Order Thank You Notecards

A bride recently asked me if she orders thank you notecards to send notes for engagement gifts is it okay to just put the couple's first names, like:  Jack & Jill or should they use the monogram they are creating for their wedding.

My answer:  You can put whatever you want on your thank you cards but it's not appropriate to use your married initial until after you're married.  Many stationers will suggest that you create a monogram using your first initials for the wedding invitation because you aren't married and using your new last name until after the wedding.

So technically you can create a married monogram for items at the cocktail hour (if you have your ceremony first) and the wedding reception.  But stick to your first names and your maiden name until you say, "I do."

Playing with the Idea of Place Cards

If you're looking for a unique way to add some personality to your reception table think about adding place cards to them.  Place cards tell your guests where they should sit at the table he or she is assigned to.

Since many of your guests are coming in pairs it won't be too difficult to place them at the table.  And if you're looking to play matchmaker at the single's table you can ensure that your friend sits next to the guy you always thought she should meet.

Place cards will add money to your stationery budget.  Talk to your stationer about using a design that matches your wedding invitation exactly or something less expensive that compliments it.  Another way to save money is to combine the place card with another item on the table, such as a menu card or favor.

5 Must-Read Stationery Tips from Mackenzie Sala of Kenzie Kate Invitations

Your wedding invitation is the first detail of your wedding that your guests will see. It will also set the tone for your wedding so it’s important to select an invitation that conveys the look and feel of your big day, including the formality. I asked Mackenzie Sala, owner of Kenzie Kate Invitations and author of the blog Something Old Something New to share her top five stationery tips. Here’s what she had to say:

1. Leave time for yourself or your calligrapher to address the envelopes. Calligraphers will need at least a week or more during the busy season. Book your calligrapher around the same time you find your stationer and ask them how long they will need so that you can plan your schedule accordingly.



2. Keep it simple. If Uncle Bob doesn't have down to the mile-marker directions from his hotel to your ceremony site, then to the reception site and back, it's ok. He can figure it out! You can trust that your guests can, and for the most part, will take care of themselves. By all means, give suggestions if you have them, but there's really no need to clutter your invitations with information that can easily be had with a quick internet search.


3. The right wording depends on you. If you are having a very laid back, outdoor wedding, don't feel obligated to use traditional, conservative wording. If your family is big on tradition, ask your stationer to help you make sure it's by the book. Let your personality and the feel of your event guide you.


4. Calculate correctly. If you are having a 150 person wedding, you probably don't need 150 invitations. You will need more like 75-100. Each couple gets one.


5. Get samples. Lots of people are ordering their wedding invitations online. The selection is unbeatable, the convenience is fantastic, and you can spend as much or as little as you like. That being said, KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GETTING. Order samples before you place your order. It takes a little extra time, but you won't be sorry you did. Knowing what you're getting for your money is totally worth it!

The above inviation suites are all samples from Kenzie Kate Inviations. To view more of Mackenzie's designs and to order your invitations visit her Web site, kenziekate.com.

A-B-C is Easy as 1-2-3 for a Reason

Just a quick tip about your seating cards: Since every guest at your wedding will probably know the ABC’s it’s a good idea to have the seating cards placed in alphabetical order by last name. Your guests will, by instinct, search for their card by this order and you will only cause chaos at the seating card table if you arrange the cards in any other way.

A Brilliant Tip from Sarah at Brilliant Event Planning

I just got home from the Lion in the Sun event—which was so much fun—and I wanted to share with you one of the tips my co-panelists brought up.

Sarah from Brilliant Event Planning mentioned that you shouldn't wait until the last minute to write and print your programs. And she's right. You probably know your bridal party members and the outline for the ceremony long before your invitations even go out. All that's left is the songs in your processional and there's no reason that the ceremony playlist has to wait until the month before the wedding to be finalized.

You should start drafting the information that will be included in your wedding program: members of the bridal party, ceremony order (with or without descriptions) a thank you to your parents and any other important information—readings, psalms or mentioning a charitable donation—about four months before the wedding so you have time to make revisions and have them printed. You also want to decide on the format: bound booklet, folded paper or printed on a fan. You can even have your program coordinate with your invitation and discuss ideas when ordering your invites. And don't forget that the more elaborate the design, the more time it will take you to put them together.

Oh So Suite

The reason you choose a color palette and theme for your wedding is so that every element of your wedding compliments each other.

When it comes to your wedding stationery you want to do the same thing. Work with your stationer to create a complete stationery suite. The suite includes all of your paper elements: Invitation, reply card, program, menu cards, seating and place cards, favor tags and any other paper detail you are planning on including.

It’s important that you bring your stationer your wedding inspiration and ideas. You can even bring a swatch and photo of your dress, the design of your cake and other finalized details to help them start designing.

The stationery suites shown here were designed by Kate Capone, owner of Oh So Suite, a design company specializing in custom invitations and complementary event essentials. Oh So Suite offers a variety of services, including: graphic design (creating monograms, stationery suites), Web site design (Wed-sites) and gift and favor design and production. They also offer letterpress, silkscreen, offset and digital printing options. In addition to designing stationery suites, the company also provides a “go-to” service where Kate can help brides and event professionals source items they are looking for. Visit ohsosuite.com to see Kate's complete portfolio and talk to her about creating your stationery suite.

Honor vs Honour and other Invitation Grammar Tips

If you’ve been reading this blog for awhile you’ve probably noticed that my spelling and grammar skills aren’t topnotch. So, to help me get better at writing I listen to Grammar Girl podcasts and bought her book last summer. I remembered that a few years back she gave a lesson on the proper way to write dates and I thought I'd repost the link to that podcast.

A groom called in to ask how he should have the year (2008) printed on their wedding invitation as well as the use of British English (honour) vs. American English (honor) on invites.

The general explanation is that we – the American public – tend to think of British English as a more formal language and therefore it is appropriate to use the British English spellings and year on an invitation, when you want to give the feeling of a more formal setting than say an invitaiton to a backyard barbeque.

Click here to read, or hear, what Grammar Girl had to say about correct grammar for wedding invitations. You can download the podcast for free.

Expert Advice: Working with a Calligrapher

You may be familiar with calligrapher Laura Hooper’s blog, A Lucky Orchid. I was lucky to have Laura design the invitation for the "I'm Getting Hitched" event in Washington, DC I spoke at earlier this year.

I personally recommend handwritten calligraphy over printed calligraphy when it comes to your wedding invitation and other paper details. I always find that printed calligraphy – no matter what the printer may say – is never as elegant looking.

A calligrapher will have several fonts that they can write, allowing you to select one that fits well with your wedding theme or palette. And of course she can match the ink to any color swatch.

I asked Laura for her tips and advice on working with a calligrapher for your wedding. Here’s what she had to say:

Budget – the first step to including hand-calligraphed writing in your wedding is to be sure that you budget for it! Calligraphy is a much loved art-form, and the intricate details and time associated with calligraphy do come at a cost, so be sure to bump up the invitation line item in your overall budget. Standard pointed pen envelope addressing can run from $2.50 - $5.00 (and sometimes more!) per envelope depending on the calligrapher and font style.

Choosing your Calligraphy Style – there are many different styles of calligraphy, from cute to classic to extremely elegant. You should choose your style after determining the overall theme and feeling for your wedding, and choose your font to further enhance that overall mood. I personally divide the styles I offer into “tiers”. Different tiers require different amounts of effort and will be reflected in your final bill. Visit Laura Hooper Calligraphy to see the styles the 20+ standard styles she works with.

Ways to Use Calligraphy – envelope addressing is the most well-known use for calligraphy, but you should also consider calligraphy for your programs, escort cards, menus, maps and hand-penned invitations. This most often involves mixing calligraphy with type-font, perhaps just featuring key words or names in calligraphy.

Working with your Calligrapher – the number one piece of advice that I could give for working with a calligrapher is to try to submit one complete/accurate list. We have hundreds of brides per year and write thousands of names and addresses any given week. Receiving multiple additions and changes starts to make things pretty confusing. We do understand that changes are often unavoidable, but you should definitely do your best to limit the additions, perhaps saving them to send all together. With that being said, it is also important to remember your calligrapher is human – mistakes will happen. The best way to deal with this is to plan ahead, order extra envelopess (generally 15% overage to be safe), and give plenty of time for your order to be completed slowly and carefully. (Note from Anne: Even if you are having envelopes addressed by a printer you will need to order extra envelopes.)

Laura Hooper Calligraphy offers a wide range of services including: addressing envelopes, custom invitations, seating and place cards, save-the-date cards, announcements, creating maps and monograms. Visit lhcalligraphy.com to view more of Laura’s beautiful work.

Email RSVPs

At last night's Lion in the Sun event the panel of bloggers were asked about having an email address for guests to RSVP to instead of a reply card. Bee of Wedding Bee mentioned that she's seeing more and more brides opt for an online reply system because they can save money on printing a formal RSVP card and envelope and postage as well as being more eco-friendly.

Melinda of Lion in the Sun suggested that instead of listing your email address on your invitation, you have a small card - it could be business card size - printed that instructs guests to RSVP on your wedding Web site or to a particular email address.

While I don't think there's anything wrong with having your guests reply via email, I do think you have to consider two things:

1 - If your guest list includes members of the "Greatest Generation" (age 70+) you have to consider that some of them may not have access to a computer let alone their own email account.  (My grandmother is still amazed that we can shop for things online.)  You may want to have a small amount of traditional RSVP cards and envelopes printed just for this set of guests. 

2 - Your invitation sets the tone for your wedding.  The more casual your invite, the more casual your guests will assume it will be and they will dress accordingly.  If you expect everyone in formal attire then you should have your invite reflect the formality of the wedding.   An email RSVP may reflect a more casual affair.

Saving the Date

What's wrong with my daughter's "save-the-date" onesie?  Well, it only tells guests that her Bat Mitzvah will be in the year 2022, it neglects all the other important details. 

So what should be printed in your save-the-date?  Here's a list of what you want to include:

• The date - month, day, year.  You don't need to name the day of the week but you can if you want to.
• The city and state, and country if you're not getting married in the U.S.  You do not need to list the exact place of the wedding, such as the church, temple or reception site
• Your names.  Don't assume that your distant relatives will know off the bat who the save-the-date is from.
• Travel and accommodation information if you have guests traveling to your wedding, especially if the wedding is abroad.  You should also include recommended airlines and hotels as well as discount codes if you've secured group rates.
• Have "invitation to follow" printed on the bottom of the card because some guests may think that your save-the-date card is the formal invitation.

You should not list where you are registered and remember that you should only send a save-the-date card to the guests you are 100% inviting.  Once you mail someone a save-the-date card he or she must receive a wedding invitation so limit the mailing list to relatives and friends who will definitely be invited to the wedding.

And by the way, there really is nothing wrong with her onesie.  It's just a cute picture that inspired me to write this post.

Save-the-Date Card Giveaway at Oh So Beautiful Paper

Save-the-date cards are a fun way to let your friends and family know the details of your wedding. They can be as straightforward or as whimiscal as you want. Unlike a formal invitation, save-the-date cards aren’t an essential item that you must have. If you’re looking to cut costs, cutting the save-the-date card is one way to save, but with the fun, informal designs you can create, many couples like them because they are a great way to let your personalities be part of the wedding details.

Whether you were planning on sending save-the-date cards to your guests or not, here’s one way to save money on your stationery budget. Visit Oh So Beautiful Paper to enter their save-the-date card giveaway, where you can win 150 save-the-date cards from Delphine Press. The letterpressed cards will come in two ink colors on Mohawk's beautiful Strathmore Writing Recycled Bright White paper. 

Here are the details:

Visit the Delphine Press Web site and browse their wedding collection to choose a favorite design. Once you've picked your favorite, create an inspiration board - including the design you've selected - showing how that design fits in with your overall wedding style. 

Submit your completed inspiration boards (in jpeg format, please) via e-mail to beautifulpaperblog@gmail.com with the subject "Save the Date Contest". Include a brief description of your wedding style as well as the two ink colors that you've chosen for your save-the-date card with your submission.

You have until 11:59 p.m. EST on Friday, July 3 to submit your entries. Nole will post the finalists on Oh So Beautiful Paper on Monday, July 6 and announce the winner later in the week.  Good luck!

Wedding Planning Tip:  Don't forget that whoever you mail a save-the-date card to also receives a wedding invitation.  You can't mail out save-the-date cards and then decide that you need to cut the list and half the people who received a card are no longer invited.  Limit your save-the-date card mailing list to guests that you know you will never cut -- close relatives and friends.

Save-the-date image above from Delphine Press

Save-the-Date Card Basics

The idea of a theme and color palette is to help you tie all of the details of your wedding together, but you may not finalize your wedding's theme and palette until the final months before the wedding.

While your wedding invitation suite should reflect the theme, colors and style of your wedding, your save-the-date card doesn't have to. And if you don't know your wedding's theme, colors and style at the time you are selecting and mailing your save-the-date cards then don't stress about it.

Talk to your stationer or search stationery sites for a save-the-date card that reflects your personalities, and you can include some of the style you've already decided on for the wedding. For example, if you've booked a reception site by the beach you can have a beach feeling - icons, colors - or if you know that your wedding will have a modern or vintage feel, look for cards that reflect that in the font and design.

Save-the-date cards can be as creative and fun or as formal and to the point as you want them to be. So keep an open mind and go with something that you love because it feels like you and your groom.

The vinatege-inspired save-the-date card pictured above is from Minna Designs, a fabulous stationery company I recently learned about. You have to click through their portfolio. Their designs are quite unique and stunning. Here are some of my favorites:

Excuses. Excuses. And the Stationery Show Wrap Up

You'll have to forgive me this one non-wedding post but I just had to post this picture. Dave and I had a baby girl a little over a week ago. This picture is from her first sponge bath. Isn't she cute?

I wrote up some posts in the weeks before she was born to keep the blog daily, but I apologize now if I miss a day here and there.

Because we welcomed our little bundle of joy a few days before the stationery show, I didn't get to walk the aisles and aisles of invites, save-the-date cards, note cards and any and everything else paper related. Lucky for me - and you - many bridal bloggers did get to cover the show and here are links to three blogs with great reviews:

• Oh So Beautiful Paper


• Brooklyn Bride


• Ritzy Bee Blog

Personalized Stamps

The cost of stamps has just gone up to 44 cents. You don’t want to mail out 100 invitations only to have them come back to you with a return to sender stamp on it. The cost of new envelopes, re-printing or re-calligraphing the envelopes and buying new stamps will out weigh the cost of the stamps you should have added in the first mailing.

To avoid making a postage error make sure you take one complete invitation set – all inserts included – to the post office and have the clerk weigh and tell you the correct postage. Then put it in the mail, sending it to yourself so you will know for sure that the postage is correct.

But what about finding the perfect stamp?

There is a wedding ring stamp available at the new rate, and I like the King and Queen of Hearts stamp. But if you can’t find stamps online or at your local post office that match your wedding theme and/or palette, you can create a custom stamp.

Zazzle.com allows you to create a custom stamp with your wedding logo, a photo or almost anything else you can think of. The stamps featured above were designed by XYZ Ink, a Los Angeles based calligrapher. Talk to your calligrapher or stationery designer about creating an image that will match your wedding theme and colors.

Place Cards: What They Are and When You Need Them

I often get asked what’s the difference between seating cards and place cards. Seating cards will tell your guests which table they are seated at and place cards will tell them which place at the table is theirs.

Place cards are not required but they do look nice on a wedding reception table and sometimes they should be used.

The image above of the long reception table is from a wedding Dave and I recently went to.  The tablescapes were gorgeous and each table sat 12 guests on each side—24 people per table.

Place cards were not used as you can see from the close up of each person’s setting below and that’s where confusion set in.


Because there were so many seats at each table, groups of friends/relatives who would have liked to sit together were divided on each side and each end of the table. We were a group of 10 people and because we all didn’t get to the table at the same time we were forced to separate into sections—2 people on one end, 2 people somewhere in the middle and 6 people sat themselves in one long row making it difficult to talk to anyone except the person right next to you.

The photo below is an example of a place card. They can be stand alone cards with a guest’s name printed or calligraphed on it. They can be placed on a napkin or above the charger or plate. Or you can combine a place card with another detail, such as the menu card or favor. To get some creative ideas, talk to your florist/event designer, stationer/calligrapher or click through online stationery galleries and blogs. Two of my favorite stationery blogs is Oh So Beautiful Paper and A Lucky Orchid Wedding.


The image above is by Beth Helmstetter and the calligraphy is by Laura Hooper Calligraphy via A Lucky Orchid Blog